Looking for Peace.....within 3million people.

As the violence continues in Chicago everyone is searching for a corner to stand on to wait and watch what will happen.  Will it be the clergy coalition that stops it?  Will it be additional officers on the street?  Will it be a longer day at Chicago public schools? Or will it be the hope of a $15million building on the South Side that brings the violence to a halt?

My news to you is that it will be none of these.

What is it that YOU are waiting for?  Are you waiting for it to get worse? Or do you feel that this does not affect you because you live in a trendy part of town and you see yourself as part of that trend so you figure that you’ll alienate the thugs out of the neighborhood.  Maybe you’re going to church several times a week locking yourself in the church to pray about the violence.  Or you just don’t give a shit what happens because the violence is affecting the losers and scum of the Earth but you still go to church and pray for the innocent and wish for death and hell for which you have identified as evil. 

Chicago has been a place of corruption my entire life, 37 years, and much more before me.  Regardless of who’s been in the Mayor’s office people have been paid off to do things they shouldn’t.  In that mess there’s violence, drugs, prostitution, abuse, murder, and a lot of money exchanging hands and all the while people look the other way based on if their garbage is picked up every week and the street lights are on.

Citizens of Chicago what are you waiting for?  Are you really waiting for ONE person to stand up and take control of everything and turn this city around?  People have tried and many have failed due to their fear of death and fear of monetary loss of some kind.  Yes people, there are actual people out there that are very willing to kill anyone that stands in their way of profit and power but what many fail to see is that there’s about 3 million people that can overcome several hundred…you think I’m kidding?  You are being held at bay by a handful of people and they are controlling the value of your home, your job, your income, your daily expense, and your Faith (for those of you that have any) all by letting off a few shots in the night.  I don’t mean to make this trivial but this is what it comes down to and YOU are still too scared to notice.

There are children being killed almost every night but because it’s on the South Side of Chicago, mostly, and Black most of Chicago does not care.  Can you see that YOU not caring is breeding hate, violence, and murder?  You can’t see that?!

It is impossible for me to think that 70+ pastors got together at a church in Down town Chicago and are baffled at what they should be doing about the violence, REALLY!?! If these pastors have at least 100 people in their churches that would make 7000 people that listen to them on a weekly basis and they cannot figure out what to do about the violence?!  This is why SO many people cancel out church and God because there are people like this that are supposed to be people with some sort of guidance and knowledge and strength to deal with these issues (well that’s what they make themselves out to be) and they FAIL at the most BASIC of all, LOVE!

Think about a time that you REALLY loved something in your life and think about what you did to obtain it, protect it, and keep it from going away……isn’t that a beautiful thing, so why the hell are you having such a hard time expressing that same feeling with other HUMAN beings!?

No, I cannot teach you how to talk to a gang member or drug dealer because I reached out to them for my need to express to them a genuine love and attention that they may have never received from someone else.  How did you learn to make friends when you were a child?  You found something in common or shared something in common like a class room, neighborhood block, a favorite sport or cartoon, but it was something you shared, so why can’t you share your interest of living a better life with someone that may not be leading a better life for themselves but is expressing (in their own way) that they want a better life?  Is it really that hard?

I have walked, taken into, and driven into communities wearing opposite gang colors with a message of Peace and have always made it out.  The day that my own looked at me out the corner of their eyes I had to realize that my ego had gotten the best of me and I stepped back and remain in that position.

I gave myself entirely to the streets willing to submerge my mind, body, and soul into this violent world and things changed quickly.  All of a sudden the thugs wearing hoodies and all black clothing went to suits and smart looking glasses in the corridors of government.

I challenge you to move out of your comfort zone and become MORE

I challenge you to drop your belief of hell and hate

I challenge you to engage those around you

I challenge you to discover the crimes being committed at your local government offices

I challenge you to open your mind and see that there are more sides to life not just what you see in front of you

I challenge you to be courageous

I challenge you to love

I challenge you to be someone that cares about others just because it’s the right thing

Then I dare you to do something about it because it will never be ONE person that will change everything so that you don’t have to lift a finger to improve not only your life but the life of our society.

I DARE you to really be Free!

Go ahead…I dare you!

AMOR

Gerardo

Looking for Peace.....with a gun?

The actions in Aurora, Colorado are the fault of each American and we have to accept that responsibility.

I say that not to piss people off or to take an “anti-American” stance I say it because I believe it to be true based on what is common knowledge of what is Right to have as an American.  What do I mean by that you ask?  Well guns have been a fascination of Americans since day one and Americans are very proud of their freedom to own a gun and see nothing wrong with it.  I use the word “fascination” because of its root that means “bewitch, enchant” there’s something that moves people in way that nothing else can replace when holding a loaded gun in your hand.  It’s a sense of power and some would say a sense of being able to correct if one is called upon to do so.  Because of this enchantment we yearn to see it as often as possible so we create the situations for it to happen like TV, movies, music, toys, video games, and at times “comedy.”   

But when one person uses a gun for an action like that of Aurora, CO we are ready to crucify that person and the gun industry for creating that gun.  

Now, I’m not defending the guy in Colorado but I want you to understand that there’s a root cause to everything and we need to respond to that root cause and not wait for these things to happen.

Rene Girard has a theory called Mimetic Desire and it is very interesting and there’s a book out there that breaks it down and does a great job of explaining a lot of things it’s called “The Bible, Violence, and the Sacred” written by James G. Williams.

What this individual did was basically a perfect example of what this book explains in terms of what can happen when things go the wrong way and I’ll admit it can be a tough read but it is worth the time to read over several times.  In all of this we as members of this Society ALL know that having guns available to its citizens has not helped the violence in our land but people are very careful as to how they address the issue.  So when one moron commits a horrible act like this while using a gun EVERYONE wants to jump on gun control and make this moron the scapegoat for OUR refusal of addressing this issue properly in the past.  This individual will die either at the hands of the court or in prison but well before he dies someone, if not already, is going to talk about how conceal weapons legislation is needed in every state.  This is to fulfill our Mimetic desire to be that Superhero, ‘if I was in that theater and I had a gun I could have ended it all there and less people would have died or been injured.’  It is a justification to “correct” a situation but is it the right one?

No doubt that possibly some of the family and friends of the victims might say ‘yes we needed someone in there to stop him’ but what we ALL are not realizing is that WE ALL are that someone that could have stopped it.  How you ask?  Well to be honest it really begins with how we see ourselves.  Mostly Americans are viewed as the Heroes that save those in need so in some people’s eyes it makes sense to own a gun(s) so that they can save someone somewhere at some time. But have we thought about how different our society would be if we did not see the need for a gun?  I know what some of you are thinking, people are bad first before they are good, right?  Is that the way a “God fearing” Nation should look at people?  Well depending on what church you go to some people might believe that the need for a gun in our society is helpful because one day the “evil doers” might want to take over the country and allow Gay people to marry, allow Non-Whites equal vote and representation, give equal pay to Women, and provide free health care and education equally to all…I guess for some people the need for a gun is VERY real!

I’m not going to quote a passage from any Holy Scriptures here and I’m not going to tell you that I have the answer to the problem and I’m not going to ask you to sign a petition. All I am saying is that we ALL need to own what happened in Colorado because we ALL have either ignored or advocated around the issue of guns in our society.  Do I think guns will disappear from our society...if I gave you an answer then you wouldn’t have to think about it.

Peace/AMOR…if you got the time

Gerardo

Looking for Peace.....in depths you may not be ready for

I was having lunch with my mom today and she was telling me about how she went out and got a part time job today working with families, in particular helping them communicate better with their children.  My mom worked for Hull House Association for 20+ years and retired months before we found out that they were closing their doors.  My mom was hurt by the news and quickly became worried about the families she was working with.  Today she tells me that she can see better how one that works in a social service agency can be blinded by what is actually going on in the community and she saw that today for the first time.  My mom said that she realizes that she needs to do more in the community because what the traditional community based organizations are doing is not enough.  So she asked me about the violence and why is it that I’m not involved with an agency working to reduce the violence.  So I described to her how life of a social worker and violence prevention specialist is like these days and here it goes:

Cease Fire (CF) has managed to suck up all the funding for violence prevention and then acts as a clearing house for other community based organizations that need their “expert” advice.  CF hires well known Brothers and Sisters in the community and by that I mean siblings, aunts, uncles, daughters, sons, etc…of former and/or current gang leaders.  They also hire Brothers that have recently come home from prison that held some weight in the past or currently do (Tio the Exec. Dir of CF IL will say that CF is unaware of anyone being currently involved in a gang…that’s just to save his ass) to work as outreach workers.  Now, on the face of it looks like a good idea and it can be but there has to be intensive work going on with these Brothers at the same time.  See, when you have been in prison for a long time it’s like coming home from a tour in Iraq. You’ve seen things that no one should see, you were in a tense state of mind 24/7 with no break in sight, you lacked emotions because you didn’t want others to think you were weak.  As time goes on it develops into PTSD among other types of physiological issues.  I don’t know this first hand because I’ve never gone to the military nor have I done time but I have had the opportunity to be around plenty of Brothers that have been in either spot.  So without an opportunity of becoming part of the society again we throw them back into a tense situation where they have to rely on past behaviors to deal with the issues.  Not only that but then they don’t have a full understanding that smoking, drinking, and helping look out for the police are NOT behaviors that a prevention worker should be exhibiting with their “clients.” If you’re out on the street working the very last thing you should be doing is acting like you in the street…I know it might be hard for some of you to understand that but bear with me.  

So given all of that we now give them a salary and full benefits and these are two things these Brothers and Sisters thought they would never have.  All they do is try to control the reaction of some of these Brothers out on the street but shouldn’t they be doing something else?  Well that would mean that they all need a Master’s degree in Social Work because apparently only then will you have the key to fix everything! (with a sarcastic tone) When these community based organizations (CBO’s) get their crew of CF workers the local agency has no control or say so over them but do require them to participate in the agency’s activities and programs and here’s where the false thought of “we did something today” comes into play.

CF workers are told that the CBO is holding a Youth BBQ to kick off the summer so they are asked to bring a certain number of youth.  CF workers go back into their hoods and draw up a list of people that are going and are told to show up.  Who in their right mind is going to turn down a free BBQ?!  So youth show up and the CBO’s Exec. Dir. is glowing with excitement because there’s troubled youth at the BBQ.  The youth walk over to CF worker and asks “how long we got to stay because we got to get back to the hood?”  CF worker says “not too long I’ll let you know.”  The Exec. Dir walks over to CF workers and asks “are they having fun?  I saw them come over and talk to you guys”  CF workers says “yea they like it but they going to have to go soon because they got some things to take care of.”  Exec. Dir leans in and says “oh like gang stuff?  OK well I’ll go tell them thanks for coming.”  Exec. Dir. walks over to youth and says “HEY GUYS!  Thanks so much for coming today and if you guys want to take a plate with you go ahead” the youth start to kind of smile and nudge each other that it’s time to go and one of them will start to make a plate of all the good stuff.  The youth all walk over to CF workers and let them know that they want to go and the CF worker says “yea ok I’ll walk you guys back to your cars.”  So as the CF workers walk away with the youth the Exec. Dir. and other staff are all watching them and thinking to themselves ‘I impacted someone today’ when in actual events one of the CF workers is the chief and order these Brothers to come through.

My point in this is that when you have to order someone or as I used to say “strongly suggest” someone to participate in something like that the only impact you made is to let them know you really don’t care if they have the skills to survive in life.  Now, some of these CBO’s will have a “youth leadership” event or something but it never talks to where these Brothers are at in their lives.  We fill a book bag worth of stuff we copied or printed out, pamphlets about STD’s, business cards of people that might be hiring, a t-shirt with some silly logo on it, and fill their stomachs with Pizza and Pepsi.  They get home from the event and dad is still kicking moms ass, Brother is out around the corner doing stuff he shouldn’t, sister is secretly texting someone older from the hood that has been watching her grow up waiting for the right time to screw her but she thinks it’s positive attention, and well the Pizza you had was more food than there is in the house…did you really impact that youth’s life?

Some people might say that these CBO’s are trying and to be honest No they are not trying because if they were trying then Zero tolerance policy’s wouldn’t be posted all over their walls about who they will and will not help according to that policy.  There’s a much deeper need that is NOT being met in our communities and the places you would think would have that ability to fulfill that need are the one’s helping the violence continue in an indirect way.

Regardless of my background I would always lay it out loud and clear to who I worked with that my objective was to get them in a better place in their lives meaning that I would address everything around them.  I know that some of the older guys that I know had issue with me being like that but I also know that I helped them change a bit as well.

What CF is doing is based on a model that was given to them by someone that did not understand how to implement the strategy because they had no part in it.  For those of us that helped create that model we know what is missing and no one cares to hear about it and CF is incapable of implementing it because the Brothers that they have expressed no desire of going that deep. 

With each death of every child in Chicago I lose more and more respect for the community based organizations that I once championed as well for the “organizers” that are unwilling to deal with this issue.  The amazing thing about it is that there is no need for a $15million building to be built for it to happen…did Jesus, Buddha, MLK, Malcolm X, or Che need that to impact people?....I’m sure someone out there will criticize me for putting those names together but think about what they did and how they did it and YOU tell me if we need a $15million building to get things done.

Peace/AMOR

Gerardo

Looking for Peace.....in a phrase.

I’ve been quiet for the last few weeks mostly because I felt I had an emotion overload and needed to pause for a moment.  Within that time many people have been shot, killed, and injured due to violence here in Chicago but as I scan through the newspapers and tweets I am interested in people’s choice of words and phrases.  The one that catches my eye the most is when people say “they died in senseless violence…” do people understand what they are saying?  We cannot make an excuse for it and say ‘well you know what I mean’ because when people say these things in a moment of anger or sadness it is what they truly feel.  

If we look at the word “senseless” the definition for it is: destitute or deprived of sensation; unconscious.  So the statement is saying that someone died in the middle of an unconscious moment of violence, would it have been better if they died in a moment of conscious violence?  I know it doesn’t sound right but that is what the statement of “senseless violence” is implying.

Most of the people (there are others) I have read about or watched say a statement like this have been people in an impoverished, gang, or drug type of community or Pastors.  Why is that? The neighborhood I grew up in was a blue collar community and we had our gangs but rarely drugs until the mid to late 1980’s. In 1989 we moved further North into a higher income community but with a higher rate of racism from the community, school, and the police. I didn’t go back too much to the community I grew up in but by 1994 I was back in that community and in other poor communities working on reducing violence.  So it hasn’t been until very recent times that I have not been either living and/or hanging out in some of these communities and I feel out of place and out of touch.  But it has given me the opportunity to rewind my thoughts and feelings about what I experienced.

Most of the people that I’ve known over these years were people that have had hard lives either by choice (in their older age) or because “it is what it is” and that’s where the phrase “senseless violence” lives within these communities.  In a community where the city government has forgotten (by choice I believe) to service, where the board of Education doesn’t think that the school needs new books or windows, where Churches view the area residents as “devils” it is common to see violence as a way of life.  Not because they are monsters but because people are fighting to survive on a daily basis. In a community that is lacking the very basic of human needs and rights you have to do what you have to do to survive so violence is born in these sorts of environments. 

So as people have grown accustom to seeing violence the feeling that some of it might make sense is not uncommon.  They might have witnessed what can be seen as positive results from violence being inflicted on the local store owner that was over charging certain customers.  They might have seen the local bully get beat up because he took advantage of a disabled person and the Brothers out on the street took care of it after calls to the police went unanswered. 

In all of this you have Pastors in local churches that witness some of these events as well and they try to help but place the condition of “You MUST accept Jesus Christ as your Savior” before any real help is dished out.  Not all of these pastors say that or imply it but some of them that have large congregations start to walk around like a chief of their own gang when they come out of their churches.  When the Brothers on the street see this they tend to check up on these pastors to see if they truly are a chief or are just trying to walk a walk they shouldn’t be walking.  Most if not all of these pastors fail quickly in the presence of these Brothers because they don’t have the heart that these Brothers do in terms of being secure in their role.  So when these pastors fail they become submissive to the despair that flows through that community and plug into the matrix of “it is what it is.”

When these Pastors accept that they just became part of the system that accepts that there is a level of violence that makes “sense” and that is truly an unconscious thought. 

We cannot think that a level of violence is acceptable in our society because someone will start to place standards on whom, what, and where that violence is acceptable and chances are that it won’t be the people that the violence will affect…but has someone already done so?

What is a sensible act of violence, can you tell me?

Peace/AMOR

Gerardo